Got weighted the other day and have lost 18lbs total , not pleased with the weight loss I just feel like it should be more. Did the little table of taking your weight and times it time 12 to get the number of calories you intake in a day to maintain that weight, OMG it was awful. 3,700 cal. I have reduce my portions and cut sweets out of my diet, no extra sugar, etc. I do work out everyday for hour, walking on tread mill and doing weights. they say that I am turning fat into muscle which weighs more. ok well that is not how I thought this would go. I am holding tight and staying the course, I have moved into using a salad plate to eat on so to keep my portions down. I know this is going to take time, my head knows it but my heart wants so much more NOW. Got a call from Nat, she had a dream had not seen me in a while and when she did see me I was a size 8. Oh what a great dream...I do not hope for that right now my goal is to maybe be a size 14-16. I have set several goals, first to get below the major hundred mark, then take each set of lbs by 10 to 20. If I look at how much I need to lose it is just too over whelming. I will not get to go to go4th tonight have funeral visitation for Ms. Buntin a IMS teacher died of cancer this week. Taking Joseoh and Brianna since Nichole is to sick to take them.
Nichole Leigh is very sick, had to go to dr yesterday, I offer to help her with anything but did not want me around. SO I ended up keeping the kids last night, did take breakfast to her but she barely open door, so hand breakfast to her and left. I pray everyday that she finds a way to forgive me but she has to want to do that and I don't think she does, it is much easier for her to stay mad at me. I know that God is in control of this and someday she will let me put my arms around her just to hold her and tell her how much I love her. Oh yes I do telll her by text, in person however that i can that I love her but she does not want to hear that either. Both of us are so much alike and the things that she gets so upset with me at she does with her own children. Life is just a big circle we go around and around in. I do have a great sense of Peace in my life, I pray that my family finds that peace also,
Headed to work out and then ck on moma man my day filled with to much to do......
Just got through catching up on your posts. Wanted you to know that I am thinking of you, especially this month. I love you and I know how difficult this month is for you. I liked what you said about, "bringing Casey's memory forward" as the years pass. I know how that feels. I will continue to pray for you and Nicole and I hope that you will continue to pray for me. Love you, Sissy
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